Journal 2018 Entry #5

 October 17, 2018


I am very productive this whole day since I am more energetic and happy at the same time. I don’t know why but I am glad. I really enjoyed reviewing it today. I think it is because it is simple and I am happy. I guess I had happy pills then because I didn’t know I spent much time answering questions. Its means that I am a bit ready to take Phisat and EPT. I hope so, but I know and believe that I can remember yesterday I told myself that I have to think to myself, even others, not to erase the negativity and always remember the positive sign. Today, I also enjoyed singing using the Go Sing app on my phone. I am a frustrated singer, but I believe practice makes perfect. I didn’t dream of becoming a singer; I just wanted to sing because I feel good singing and listening to music. I love singing old English songs, a song that has a beautiful meaning, like my theme song “Take me to your heart” by Michael to rock, I think I forget. Yes, it is funny, but it is true I have a theme song to myself, the theme song is not for the couple, but it is also applied to yourself or the things in your life. When I hear that song, I feel more in love with myself and happy simultaneously because the lyrics are so good. Not only is music, but all the old songs because it has a meaning that makes you feel good and in love compared to these recent songs. I am not criticizing the current song today, but I can’t appreciate it more than the old songs. I am older than a modern woman. That is funny. 

When we bonded with my older sister, I saw my high school classmates and crush in the fast food where we ate. I am not totally sure that he is, but I have a feeling that he is. I am also hoping that he is. I don’t know why I am hoping, and if he is, why? He is not my crush anymore, but I think I just want someone who makes me forget SJK in my mind or my life. I am not totally changed in this aspect. I am still the girl who turns her attention to someone to forget someone gone. I think it is true, but it is not wrong because he is not like me. I just want some company when I feel with him. When I am not busy, I always think of him, imagine that we are together, and remember the good memories we shared. I hope that I will forget him someday, not because I was in love with someone else but because I did. 

So much for that. I promised I would not go there tomorrow if I could stroll in town. I miss going to the mall, and I am also planning to buy something that makes me motivate studying more. I want to sleep, goodbye, for now, see you tomorrow.


Your, 

Cathy

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